Expectations. Those insidious little gremlins that sneak into our psyche under the radar and lie in wait, ready to sabotage our enjoyment of the holiday season. Expectations can derail our joy at other times to be sure, but “big” events like holidays, weddings, and vacations are times when they can be the most impactful.
What is an expectation? The anticipated outcome of a future event. For example, let’s say you stay up very late making personalized cookies for your child’s class. Expectation might sneak into the process and have you picturing the teacher noticing the detailed icing work, the kids smiling at the neat lettering of their name, and devouring the crunchy, delicious bite with appreciation. The reality that those amazing cookies got lost in the shuffle of a big class party and no one really noticed, never mind complimented you on them leaves you feeling resentful of the sleep you lost and the work and love you put into creating those cookies. Grrrr…..
While our own minds can birth many and varied expectations of how events will unfold during the holiday season, those little flames of anticipation are fueled by the outrageous yet alluring advertising that is ubiquitous this time of year. We can watch a commercial for, let’s say a food product such as rolls or seasonings, and while we can objectively see how the perfectly snowed upon house, elaborately appointed family room with perfect Christmas decorations is unrealistic, it still has an impact. We want our holidays to unfold with that much beauty, that much happiness, that much……perfection.
You may be wondering at this point if I have morphed into a real humbug. I assure you I have not. I offer this caution as much to myself as to you, dear reader, that we may make a conscious choice right now to not pin our peace of mind and enjoyment of this time of year on a specific outcome of external events. The truth is we cannot control other people’s moods and choices, the weather, the economy, or really anything outside ourselves. And that’s okay. Those elements can influence our joy without controlling our internal state, and that’s a lovely place from which to live.
This holiday season can we aspire to go within and connect to our Higher Self and find our joy there? Grounded in that presence and love that is totally unconditional, and live from that space? We can absolutely revel in the gorgeous light displays, hot wassail, cuddly jammies, holiday movies and all the things that enhance our joy, but are not the source of our joy. So when the gingerbread house is a disaster, the holiday dress is too tight, the invitation doesn’t come, and families quarrel, you are still on solid ground; peaceful, grateful and all cozied up in the love that created this season.
I wish a healthy, joyful holiday season to you and your loved ones.
If there is any way I can serve you during this month or into the new year, please reach out to me. I would be happy to support you in creating your heart’s desire.
